Monday, September 8, 2008

Cream Cheese Memories

In case you didn't know, Bridget is pregnant. She is going to have a baby. I am not. But I am going to have a party to eat nothing but sweets and celebrate someone else being knocked up (term of endearment BTW). Okay, and celebrate the baby, too. That, my friend, is a party!

Yesterday it hit me as I lay down to sleep that there will be a hoard of women coming to my house tomorrow night. (Is fifteen to twenty woman considered a hoard or a cackle?) I should probably trim down the sporadic jungle wilderness that is my front yard. Maybe weed-eat (hmm, that is the correct term, right?) around the nicely painted numbers that I paid some random guy with a can of spray paint to stencil outside my house on the curb so that people would know the number associated with our freshly painted abode. Oogle if you must, but know that the cactus was part of the package deal.

I have images to keep. I laugh as I write that, because, in all honesty, I really have no idea what image/s people have of me.

Suffice it to say that I woke up early this morning and took the time to mow my lawn...or at least the patches of grass that make up the desert quilt of dirt, dead leaves, weeds, grass, and feces from the annoying stray cat(s) that thinks my yard is it's own personal litter box. I ran out of gas 3/4 of the way through, so I might need someone to park in front of the side of my house so as to hide the only real lush tall green growth we have in the front yard. Lets not even talk about the back yard. My blinds will be shut, out of sight out of mind...at least for tomorrow night. No peeking!

I am planning on going out in the morning tomorrow to weed-eat. I guess I could probably assume that people will know where to go because it is the one house with all the cars parked in front, but sidewalks are a bit taken over as well. I can't get grass to grow in my yard, and I can't get it to stop growning onto the sidewalks and in the cracks. Go figure on that one.

Today I (okay, we) baked.all.day.

I find it ironic that one spends so much time cooking/backing to watch the hard work be consumed within minutes. I think I might have everyone lick their cookies like suckers to make them last longer.

Today we made FHE cookies, Chocolate Chip Cookies, 4 cheesecakes, Heaven's Hair (maybe Hare..as long as there isn't any real hair/hare in it) and Pumpkin Bars. Jaylee wonders where I get my perfectly golden tan. The secret is out of the bag. Nothing beats rotating around a hot oven for 6 hours...perfect height for perfect legs every time. Results may vary.

I think we could call this a cream cheese party because a lot of what I made had cream cheese in it. I bought 8 packages at the store. Speaking of the store, as I was checking out the lady was like...so...you like baking? I fought back the urge to ask her what made her think that? Minus the 8 bars of cream cheese, sugar, flour, brown sugar, chocolate chips, butterscotch chips, and pudding galore, I really have no idea what would give her that impression. Yes. I like to bake. Usually not that much and not usually all in one day.

Tomorrow I have one chocolate on chocolate cake to make, fruit filled burritos (with chocolate of course), and a dip for fresh fruit and cookies. Most of these recipes I haven't tried before, and before I dare to try them myself I have to make sure someone else will eat them, hence the party so I hope that they taste as yummy as the beaters did. And if they don't, lie to me so you won't hurt my feelings. On second thought, you better not. I might have tried the same thing, secretly thought it tasted like cardboard, smiled, continued to shovel it in until I could find an opportunity to switch plates with someone or make it to the trash can without being spotted. So I would know that you know that such-and-such tasted like burnt rubber. Just kidding. It will all taste fantastic. I am getting it catered.


I hope I made enough. I doubled most everything. I figure a party with all women will mean a party where the woman don't have to worry about how much they eat. We stick together...and no one has to know that so-and-so had two pieces of cheesecake, 4 cookies, a pumpkin bar and a cup of milk to wash it down.

Crap.

I need milk to wash it down! How could I forget an essential?! You know, if you throw a party and offer everyone dessert...someone is bound to ask for a glass of milk to go with it. (Good thing Milk is on sale at Fry's.)

6 comments:

Crystal said...

Boy am I glad that I RSVP'd to come to this party. It sounds great and it sounds like you baked your little heart out. I look forwarding to shoveling it all down with you tomorrow night.
Crystal
p.s. Let me know when you want me to come over and help with your garden.

H said...

...and chances are...if you give us a glass of milk, we'll want some dessert to go with it! I bet you're just as exhausted as all those children at the end of Laura Numeroff's books, huh?

Liz said...

Man, if I realized what you had done to get ready for tonight then I would have licked my cookie instead of shoveling it down along with everything else I ate :). Everything was delicious, thanks for having me over!

M said...

Great food, great people, great party! YOU ARE WONDERFUL! And I am so thankful to have been invited.

oh and P.S. You have a great image in my mind no matter what your front yard looks like *grin*

FizixMamma said...

So it sounds great, how did the cheese cakes turn out? I it sounds like you made the chocolate raspberry burritos good huh?

MAGA said...

YUMMY, I GOT HUNGRY JUST READING THIS, DARN TO BAD WE ATE ALL THE CAKE LAST WEEKEND.